Visitor: Dear Madhukar, I was nine years on the spiritual search and .....

Madhukar: …I destroyed it.

V: (laughs) Something like that, yes. It is good like this. Now, with searching for my Self in Advaita suddenly physical problems appeared. Am I full of resistances? How can I let them go and let everything happen?

M: It astonishes me that you ask me whether you are full of resistances because after the last Satsang in Cologne you came to me and you said: I am full of resistance. It surprises me that you now ask me whether you are full of resistance.

V: I am not really aware of what resistances there are.

M: At that time you were aware of it.

V: Yes, and what can I do now? One shall not do anything, but that is difficult for me now. How can I let go my resistances?

M: First you strive for getting the best medical advice and help for your physical complication of which you were telling about.

To the other issue I only can say that it does not make sense asking Advaita and also asking for the blessing of a Master of Advaita but still holding on to other old concepts. I never told you that you have to let go. You bring a whole bag full of spiritual concepts from your nine years spiritual search. This bag is heavy and stinks. You are dragging it around with you and you wonder why you are exhausted. I told you: you are welcome, put down the bag. Some rats or coyotes will be happy about it.

If you call an old garbage bag for letting go: I cannot remember ever standing in front of a garbage can carrying a garbage bag, which was already stinking and the juice running out of it, asking myself while bending over the trash dumpster: How shall I let it go? That always went very quick!

V: I want to let this happen. But as already said, it is very difficult if one has problems.

M: Well, that is because what you experienced on this nine years spiritual journey is for you not trash but something precious. I do respect that but you shall not complain then. You hold on to old experiences – they are over. You hold on to old concepts – they were not true even back then. They grew on the muck of mind. Good-natured mind, but they are not truth.

V: And how can I now recognize these resistances so I can let them go?

M: In our dialog it would be favorable when you would listen to me for three sentences as I listen to you.

Labels: Dialogs